


Insincerely Yours

by Xyl_3



Category: Glee
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, M/M, Not Blaine or Klaine Friendly, Strippers & Strip Clubs
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-02-28
Updated: 2019-02-28
Packaged: 2019-11-06 19:10:08
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 2,763
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17945456
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Xyl_3/pseuds/Xyl_3
Summary: Sebastian never ended up in Ohio but he does go to college in New York as an older, slightly less despicable but still shallow, entitled asshole. He wanders into a peep show and finds Kurt.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Technically this has been posted on my lj for a year now, but it's not complete and neither is anything else I'm writing so sorry about my lack of self control ¯\\_(ツ)_/¯
> 
> Also the dancing booths I'm picturing are basically straight out of that one scene in The Rock's Walking Tall, so...

Sebastian wasn't normally one for exotic dancers. You could normally get just as good a show at a club for half the price, and drunken clubgoers were more likely to blow you in the bathroom after.

  
The place was fairly respectable looking, as far as strip clubs went. It was a little seedy, sure, but it wasn't out and out sketchy. It was configured almost like a tiny movie theater: pay your money for the show you wanted, walk in, get a private show, a live porno for all that there was no climax on the dancer's end. Sebastian had had a long day, and walking in and rubbing one out to some hot piece of ass appealed more to him right now than putting the effort in to go out or (even worse) going home and giving up on the day.

  
So he paid his fee and walked into a "live nude ~~girls~~ boys" booth.

  
There was a guy perched on a chair against the wall furthest away from the partition, legs demurely crossed and attention on his iphone. He wasn't Sebastian's normal type: a bit on the twinky side, uptight looking and _overdressed_ , but Sebastian was already here.

  
The guy looked up in poorly hidden annoyance, then he stood, moved the chair to the center of the room, pressed a few buttons on his phone, and started to dance as the music came on.

  
The beat was good, more or less. Not raunchy, but close enough to sultry to work for the moves he was pulling. It was the lyrics that really made Sebastian pay attention. He didn't recognize it, some British chick on the edgy pop side of things, but anyone that was willing to call out their customers like that, well.

  
" _Let's be clear/I'm here/I'm here to make money/money/money_ "

  
And despite that clear apathy (verging on disgust) the boy clearly had for his unseen customer, he was working his body like a true professional. He had his working face on, and he was arching, popping, and dropping like a genuine hedonist. His hips moved like a fucking wet dream and his flexibility was impressive. He lost his shirt and showed off a much more muscular physique than Sebastian would have guessed.

  
" _Won't somebody take me home?/I'm ready for my bed now_ " sang the track as the boy writhed up in simulated fucking. " _Insincere/Insincerely yours tonight_ "

*****

The guy didn't leave when the song stopped, but he also didn't open up any communication or put on another song. Sebastian pulled a $20 from his wallet and added a note when he slipped it through to the dancer.

  
 **Bold choice.**

  
The stripper's brow furrowed as he did, then his eyes abruptly widened. Sebastian may not spend a lot of time near the sex worker scene, but he knew that tipping was a standard part of it, and unconventional as he was, he was an amazing performer. (Then again, if his normal customers failed to tip, it might explain some of his disdain for them.)

  
The boy lunged toward the window and slammed the release on the barrier. "Oh shit!"

  
Sebastian gave him his best smirk and raised an eyebrow.

  
"You're not- I'm so sorry, I- My ex normally comes in around now and I thought-"

  
"Seriously?" Sebastian couldn't help interjecting. "Your ex still comes to watch you dance? Did you meet here or what?"

  
"We met in _high school_ , and he only started coming _after_ we broke up. I think he thinks he's being supportive or romantic or something, but I am _all kinds_ of done with it, so I - I mean, I'm still a professional, I can't just not do my job, but -"

  
"It's fine, Princess, relax," Sebastian interrupted again, slouching into a lazier sprawl which no doubt drew some extra attention to his interest. The guy was clearly freaking out about his actions, but Sebastian wasn't ashamed enough of himself to mind a little mocking. "If this is you phoning it in, I'd love to see full effort."

  
The guy, who'd just been rubbing off on a chair to a song about how much he didn't care for the guy watching him, turned bright red.

  
"Oh, I mean, that's the least I owe you! Wait, just one minute, I would absolutely never be this unprofessional under normal circumstances."

  
The guy rushed off, leaving Sebastian bemused.

When he came back in a few moments later, he was wearing _obscenely_ short shorts, knee high stiletto boots, and a too-large white men's button down, half opened. He also exchanged the chair  
for a stripper pole which he quickly secured.

 

The lights took on a sharper tone and the boy closed the window again.

  
Sebastian couldn't help laughing when Nancy Sinatra was his next song selection. It wasn't the original, this one was a touch faster, with a heavy bassline and some moaning in the background.

  
Sebastian had thought the chair showed off his flexibility, but it had nothing on the pole. The guy also made better use of his space this time around, crawling across the floor, teasing his shirt down over his shoulders and spinning back and forth to flash his nipples or the dimples at the base of his spine. He even approached the wall Sebastian was behind, teasing him with bedroom eyes and tantalizing closeness, going so far as to brace of one his " _boots made for walking_ " against the window and dipping into the stretch, giving Sebastian a fabulous view of his thighs and crotch. Once he'd completely ditched the shirt, he used his hands to trace the curve of his own throat when he threw his head back on an arch and used his muscles to great effect, preforming acrobatic tricks gracefully.

  
_Hot damn_. Sebastian was going to have to stop by an ATM on the way home, because he was ready and willing to give this guy all the cash on his person.

*****

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Songs used:  
> Insincerely Yours - Lily Allen (I did a little internet research to see if this was a suitable song for a chair routine, and paired it with this video. It passed, as far as I was concerned.  
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Ijzm-rF-udk)  
> These Boots Are Made For Walking (DJ Flex Mix) - Nancy Sinatra


	2. Chapter 2

Returning to the little peep show/strip club wasn't an entirely conscious decision. It wasn't far enough out of his way that he had to justify it, and the guy's fucking _topless dancing_ had stuck out in his memory more than the majority of his actual sex partners ever had.

He didn't have to decide if he was planning to go in, because he heard the stripper's distinctive voice coming from the attached alley. In normal circumstances, Sebastian would never even consider heading towards it. Ignoring the fact that they were outside his work place and he worked in a stigmatized job, approaching people in alleyways was incredibly shady unless you'd both just exited the same place or you were trying to bum a smoke. He knew how to respect boundaries.

There was another voice in the alley, though, and there was a note of discomfort in the stripper's voice that he didn't like.

He rounded the corner carefully and saw another boy invading the stripper's space. The stripper was facing Sebastian's position, but his head was down.

"Hey," Sebastian offered, deliberately keeping his tone light. He wasn't trying to start anything, just diffuse whatever situation was happening here.

The guy took an instinctive step back and the stripper's head snapped up, eyes widening when he clocked Sebastian. "Oh," he breathed.

He didn't look _scared_ , so Sebastian approached. If he'd just seen them on the street, as strangers, Guy #2 would have been more Sebastian's type. He was a little short, a little thick, energetic looking with an expressive face. Sebastian would have wanted to get him in bed as soon as possible.

What he wanted to do right now was punch him right in his even, white teeth and steal the stripper away like a goddamn knight in shining armor.

He didn't, because he was an adult, and also aware of the legal consequences of assault. Instead he stepped even closer to the stripper, getting between the pair and hovering a hand behind the man's back, wanting to guide him away but not letting himself touch without permission.

"Kurt," Guy #2 said, and the stripper, _Kurt_ , leaned back into Sebastian's offered touch.

"Wanna get out of here, or are you needed back inside?" Sebastian asked, ignoring the other guy entirely. He wasn't actually propositioning Kurt (although he happily _would_ ) but he really wanted to get them out of this situation.

Kurt glanced at the door, at the guy, and then back at Sebastian. "Yeah, let's go," he agreed.

Sebastian led him out, hand still splayed against the small of his back, and he would really have liked to check in with Kurt but the guy from the alley actually fucking _followed them out_ , still trying to get their attention. He didn't want to take the kid home, but clearly they needed to go somewhere else. "You like Korean food?" he offered.

Kurt startled slightly but went along with it. "Sure."

Sebastian smiled and steered them down a different street. "C'mon then."

******  
He'd been to the restaurant often enough that he could just hold up two fingers at the familiar hostess and say "table." She was bustling them back to an intimate corner before the stalker even made it through the door. She winked at him as she lit the candle on their table and left.

"Saucy," he muttered, but he knew he was leaving an extra large tip tonight, especially when she frowned at the stalker guy and shook her head.

"I'm not sure I've actually seen anyone deny Blaine something before," Kurt mused. "Do you have magic powers?"

"I come here a lot, I don't make trouble, and I tip well," Sebastian said. He could hear the hostess putting on a well executed but completely fake accent and refusing to capitulate to Stalker Blaine's demands. "I wouldn't call that magic powers, but it tends to do the job."

Kurt laughed. "Well, the last two worked on me, so I guess you might be on to something," he allowed.

Their waiter came by, a guy named Tom that also went to NYU. "Hey, Bas. What can I get you guys?"

After Tom had taken their orders, Kurt turned back to him. "Bas?"

"Sebastian Smythe, at your service," Sebastian introduced himself. "Kurt?"

Kurt smiled. "Kurt Hummel."

"So, Kurt, I assume that's the ex?"

"One of them, yeah," Kurt agreed.

Sebastian raised an eyebrow. "I hope they don't all have boundary issues?"

"No, just Blaine. Adam would never have even considered surprising me at work."

"You break up because of the job?"

" _Adam_?" Kurt laughed, "No, never. I wasn't actually working there until after we'd giving up on dating, but he's the least controlling man I've ever met. He thought it was great as long as I was happy and safe."

"Are you?"

Kurt shrugged. "It's a job. Obviously there are days that I hate it, but mostly it's a rush. I get to practice my dancing while getting paid for it, I'm in control of how much I interact with my customers, and performing is my passion - even if it's just a sex show for one. I work the matinee hours because we don't get pornographic until after dark. Unless someone needs me to cover their time slot, I never do that. It's a nice ego boost, though, knowing you can get strangers hot. That's why Adam thought it was good, actually. I had some self esteem issues that a few weeks dating England's most charming man couldn't entirely cure."

"England's most charming man?"

"Adam is an absolute treasure," Kurt vowed.

"Why on Earth did you break up, then?" He learned closer and asked, conspiratorially, " _Ugly_?" in a stage whisper.

Kurt slapped at him gently. "Stop, no! He's gorgeous, and I'm _not_ that shallow." He shook his head. "Bad timing. I wasn't over my ex when we met, I was juggling school and work and only just coming out of a depression, and personal shit just kept piling up against me. We decided to put dating on hold until I could get my head on straight, but then he got this amazing job offer outside New York. Even if we'd been really serious, it would have been stupid to pass it up, and as it was..." 

Kurt shrugged. "We're still friends. We talk, but neither of us wanted to do the distance thing so I guess he'll always be the one that got away. I made a lot of great friends out of it, including him, if nothing else." Kurt rolled his eyes. " _Unfortunately_ , it also made me vulnerable to getting back together with my old ex, who wasn't so respectful of my need to sort myself out. And my old friends, the ones that knew us from before, they all wanted to live vicariously through our "perfect romance," so I had trouble finding a reason to say no."

"Isn't no enough?"

Kurt snorted. "Not in Lima, and not with Blaine," he said bitterly.

Sebastian reached across the table to touch Kurt's hand. "It's enough for me. You say no - for any reason - I'll leave you alone. Don't feel like you have to-"

Kurt shook his head in negation. "Thanks, but I'm over that point in my life. I wouldn't be here if I didn't want to be, and I'll walk away if I need to. Despite all evidence to the contrary, I **can** take care of myself."

Sebastian nodded and changed the subject.  
*

"I'm not normally this stupid," Kurt said out of the blue as they were finishing their meal. "Just walking off with strangers - or customers - I mean."

" **Good** ," Sebastian surprised himself by saying. "I'm not normally this chivalrous, so I can relate."

Kurt smirked. "This is you being chivalrous?" he teased.

"Bought you dinner, didn't I?" Sebastian joked back as they stood. "I'll even walk you home like a proper gentleman."

"Fine. But at least one of my tall, gym bunny roommates will be there to protect my honor if you get fresh."

Kurt was definitely still joking, but that was a sincere warning too.

"Noted," Sebastian acknowledged. "Just how many tall, athletic roommates do you have?" He leered a little.

"Just two, thank the stars," Kurt answered. "That loft had a revolving door of people coming through for the first two years. Sam and Brody and I have managed to co-exist perfectly well for the last six months." He shrugged and amended "Technically Brody's the same height as me, but his arms are the size of my head."

"Damn," Sebastian praised easily. He had a great body, but he was always going to be more lean than ripped.

"It's disgusting," Kurt sighed, in a tone that said it was much closer to unfairly hot than grotesque.

Kurt huffed as they saw the creep try to leave right behind them. Hannah was tying him up - bless her - but he had obviously waited them out and had every intention of resuming his stalking.

Sebastian had expected as much, given his earlier perseverance. It was part of the reason he'd wanted to walk Kurt home.

"I suppose I'll be inviting you in," Kurt surmised as they start to walk to the subway.

"You don't have to-"

"He knows where I live and while I think he's too scared of Brody to try forcibly inviting himself over, I don't trust him not to start something with you."

"Seriously?" Sebastian asked judgmentally. While the other boy might have a little more mass, Sebastian easily had five or six inches on him and years of playing a physical sport. The only thing stupider than starting a fight in the middle of the street was starting one you would _lose_.

Kurt gave an exasperated twitch. "Unfortunately," he agreed. "He has a very inflated sense of confidence."

Sebastian made a face.  
*

"Sam, would you mind escorting my gentleman caller back to the club when you go? He rescued me from a Blaine encounter earlier and I don't want him getting cornered."

Sam - tall, blond, and built - smiled genially. "No problem, man. I'll try to talk to him again. It was one thing in high school, but this is totally not cool. You know if you tell Boris to keep him out, he will. Or just ask Lyla to ban him. The scariest ladies always like you the best."

"I'd rather he pay to bother me with the glass barrier than corner me in public for free," Kurt countered. 

"Your call, dude," Sam ceded easily. "Hey, Hero, thanks for helping Kurt out. My shift starts in an hour so we're leaving in fifteen."


End file.
